Confessions
POSTED ON Monday 27 June 2016 AT 22:15

We broke up. He did not say that directly to me, but somehow we broke up. I’ve been away for two weeks. I had to go to Japan for my internship. He stayed here, finishing his studies. At first, it’s going quite well; we had video calls, messaging all the time. Day by day, somehow we were growing apart. I was so busy with my internship. There are so many things that I had to manage. He was busy too as he was in his final year. Even though I was busy, I still made time to at least send him a message like, good morning, good night, sweet dreams.

As time passes by, no more messages. Somehow we had stopped to send messages to each other. Hardly an email. Before, even if I was busy the whole day, he would text me to say you’ve worked hard today, or goodnight. Surprisingly, I was okay with that. I was extremely busy that I did not notice that we have stopped caring about each other. Moreover I did not try to text him first. He must be busy. He must know that I have so many things to do.

Two years passed by, I managed to finish my internship! I was so happy. Finally I can go back to my country, and meet my family, also him. I remembered him every time. I missed him. I want to meet him so bad. But I was busy. I had other things to do, that I felt more important. I thought it would be okay. He would understand. He was also busy with his studies. So I packed everything, and left Japan.

It was so weird. He knew I was coming back today. I sent an email saying that my flight would land on this evening. But how come he did not pick me at the airport? Is he that busy? Well I shall wait for him at my house. Two days, two weeks, he never came. I texted him, I called, but the number is no longer available. I went to his rental house, and the owner said he left after he finished his studies. What’s wrong with him? Is he okay? Where have he been? Didn’t he miss me?

I got to work at a famous entertainment company. It is the most famous and most successful company here. Many famous and talented artists worked with the company. I am so happy. I will start working tomorrow. The company still didn’t give me my work tasks. They just say that I’ll be a manager but they didn’t say to which artist. I am so excited yet I felt like something is not right. My heart said so. I don’t want to make fuss about it since it just might be because I’m nervous to start working at a new place. Somehow, I just let that be. And I still miss him. I called his number so many times. But all I got is “the number you dial is not in service” every time. Sigh, where have you been?

Finally the day! I am so excited. I picked the best outfit I have. I must give a good first impression to my new employer. As I am waiting outside the building, I see a black car going in the company’s building. “Wow, must be one of the artist.” The door opens and what I see is unbelievable. IT’S HIM! My boyfriend. My man. My love. I don’t get it. Why he’s here? He still didn’t notice me though. He went to the passenger’s door. He opened the door and there’s a girl coming out of the car. I think I know her, she’s the famous artist working for the company. I was shocked. What is going on? My man, with her? What’s this? And that time I saw he kissed the girl. I am beyond shocked. Is he forgot me already? What has happened when I was in Japan?

I was called in the office, to be given my tasks and my artist. Everything that happened just now still can’t get out of my mind. I kept thinking, what is really going on? My head has called my artist. Finally I will meet my artist that I will work with. And it couldn’t be more unbelievable. IT’S HIM AGAIN! He is the artist. My mouth gaped. I just stared into him. My mind went blank. What should I do? What happened? He seemed shocked too. My head introduced us. So he is an artist now. An actor, famous rising actor. And I will be his manager. I can’t register this. I am my man’s manager. My man, or maybe my ex-man. I am clueless. I missed him. I want to hug him. I want to kiss him. I want to say how much I miss him, how much I love him. But I can’t. I can’t hug my employer, I can’t kiss him. My head has left us both for us to know each other more. I just sit there, on the sofa. Staring into spaces. My man. My love. When did it go wrong? What happened? Don’t you love me anymore? You have been successful now.

Silence filled the room for about ten minutes. Trying to change the atmosphere, he introduced himself once again. I know. I know you. You are my man. He told me what I should do, as his manager. He explained everything, but I still am clueless. He didn’t explain about what happen. I just nod and do my job.

That day is quite hectic. He got a drama to film and a magazine photo shoot. I arranged it all. I do my job clearly, even though I was not in my right mind. And the day ends. I have to send him to his house first, then check his schedule for tomorrow and go home. His new house is indeed big. I used to come to his rental house often before. But now things changed, I just send him to his house and go back home. We didn’t say anything in the car. I kept my straight faces even though I would want to cry on his shoulder so bad. How I want to give him a hug. How I would want to say how handsome he is today. Everything just said in my mind. He was silence too. I bet he must still in shock.

His POV.

I went to the company as usual. Rita, the girl I met at the bar still won’t go away from me. She even asked a ride to the company. Urgh I couldn’t be more annoyed. I’m going to dump this girl today. so we arrived at the company, finally. I kissed her for one last time and said to her to go away. In other words, I dumped her after the kiss. She seems relaxed, maybe she knew it already or she didn’t want to make any fuss. By the way today I would get a new manager. The manager before this left after she got laid by me. Huh, typical girl. I just come to the office as usual. The head said that the new manager is here so I went to his office.
What I saw is so unbelievable. My girl. My love, she’s in front of me now. How could this happen? I’m dumbfounded. When did she come back? Did she finish her intern? What’s she doing here? She can’t be my new manager? “Well this is your new manager.” NO WAY. My girl, is my manager. I can’t believe this.

Silence filled us. I don’t know what to do. I have a lot to say to her. How I miss her, how I love her so much. I want to kiss her, I want to hug her. But I can’t. I kept my mind straight and tell her about what she need to do, as my manager. I was being so professional right now, and I hate it. So much. I want to kiss her, I want to hug her. The day was hectic. With the drama and the photo shoot. I was extremely tired. Luckily, my girl is indeed awesome. She handled it so well, like this is not her first time. Other managers before only want to be close with me and I hate that. I am so proud of her. I want to praise her, to thank her. All I can do is nothing. I smiled to see her so engrossed in arranging everything for me. Beautiful. My girl is really beautiful.

She sent me back home, as what she had to. I want to talk with her. I want to tell her how much I suffered without her, these two years. While I was busy finishing my studies, I admit that I stopped to contact her for a while. Well it is for our own benefit. I know she is busy too. We both have something more important to do at that time. And I graduated. I was offered to be an actor of this famous company. It was a really golden opportunity to be with this company. But somehow the rules are too tight. I can’t contact anyone, even my parents. Anything happen, the company would call the parents, not me. I suffered a lot. I miss my parents, I miss her. But I can’t do anything. I moved to the company’s house. I started from the bottom. One year later, I was being recognized as an actor. But somehow I was lonely. I am a man. I need someone to be with me. I partied a lot, I was drunk every night. Many girls have slept with me. But I still miss her. What was she doing? Is she okay? Has her internship over?

It’s been quite long that I did not go out to party. I have a lot of work to do. That night Rita came to my house. Although I refused to be with her but she insisted and I have no other choice. Well it’s my usual things to do though. But the thing is I kept thinking about my girl every time I was with other girl. What would she think if she knew about all this? Will she still love me? I know I was so dumb to think that she will be okay. But somehow I still don’t want to let her go. I love her.


I am still driving. He’s still silent. I just let him be. He might be so tired. Suddenly he talked to me.

How are you?”
“Good.”
“…….”
“Did you need anything before I go home?”
Yes. Please come with me to my house.”
“Well, okay.”

I am confused but I just follow him. He might want me to help something about his work. So I enter his house. He still like simple decoration, like before. I saw our photos, on the walls. He still got that? Why? Suddenly, he hugged me form the back. I am so shocked.

I am sorry. I miss you so much. I really miss you so much.”

I cried. I didn’t say anything. I miss him. I miss his hug. I miss his kiss. I miss him so bad. I hugged him back.

“I am sorry too. I miss you too. So much.”

We calmed down. I asked him about what happened calmly. And he started to tell everything. After that I also tell him everything, about my internship, about how I find him. He said sorry because he can’t do anything. The company refused to give him freedom yet until he really became a successful artist.

I am sorry sweetheart. I love you. Will you accept me back?”

“Of course. I love you too.”

That night is the most beautiful night ever. We were together after a long and hard time. After that, I continued to be his manager. No one knows about us yet. We want to wait until he become a really famous actor. He did. A year after he won a lot of awards. People know him and recognized him as an actor. He received a lot of offer. And I am still his manager. We lived together, happily ever after.
We broke up. He did not say that directly to me, but somehow we broke up. But then, love prevails and we are together back again. I love him. I want to be with him, forever. No matter what happened, no matter how many times we broke up like this, I will be with him.


THE END.